Carefully Using Words That Build Suspense

Busy readers appreciate it when they can follow your meaning quickly. Some words automatically build suspense; if you don’t use them carefully, they can make your sentences frustrating to read.

Four words that build suspense when they start a sentence are “Although …,” “Despite …,” “Unless ….,” and “While ….” These words usually delay the appearance of the sentence subject — a delay that can frustrate readers.

Here’s an example of a short, well-paced sentence that starts with the suspense-building word “Because”:

Because Amazon is also a retailer and sells an enormous quantity of books, it has a lot more information and access to readers.

Because the sentence is short, a reader gets to the underlined sentence subject quickly. That helps the reader grasp the point and move on.

But a busy reader might get annoyed with the suspenseful buildup behind the word “Because …” if more words came between it and the subject:

Because Amazon is also a retailer, sells an enormous quantity of books, and can give its authors a bigger and more targeted soapbox, it has a lot more information and access to readers.

Keep your sentences short any time you start them with suspense-building words. Or just rearrange your sentences so the subjects come first:

Amazon has a lot more information and access to readers because it is also a retailer, sells an enormous quantity of books, and can give its authors a bigger and more targeted soapbox.

Busy readers will appreciate your getting to the point right away.

Write It Well’s book Essential Grammar includes an entire chapter on sentence structure. We’ve made all the book’s exercises available as a free download here to accompany the e-book, which is now available on Amazon.com!

Do you have an important document but not enough time to clarify your thoughts and double-check your punctuation and grammar? Just use Write It Well’s editing services to make sure your readers follow your ideas and respect your voice.